You Disappoint Me: The Importance of Asking Questions

They were at loggerheads. It started off with a frustrated comment about a church member’s absence from the annual church meeting. When the guilt-trip did not have the desired impact, the conversation spiraled into accusations of being hard, selfish, and cruel. From being frustrated at the lack of attendance at a church meeting, the person now heard “you disappoint me.”

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Companionship in Marriage

Companionship in Marriage   Then the LORD God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” Genesis 2:18 (ESV)   I recently taught a lesson on the importance of companionship between a husband and wife in marriage. Companionship is not just an important component in marriage; it is a biblical obligation. One of the aspects of the marital covenant is to agree to be a friend or a companion to one another for life. When a marriage breaks down, we often find that the couple has mostly been living separate lives in the months or years before entering into biblical counseling. What we learn is even when they...

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Remember the Faithfulness of God

There are many definitions of depression out there in the world, but biblically, depression can be defined by just three words: Sorrow without hope. A depressed counselee has lost hope, and now believes she will never be happy again. Perhaps something terrible has happened to trigger this season of deep sadness. But often, there has been no crisis or life-changing event that has shaken the counselee’s faith.

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Encouragement in the Storm: Hurricane Harvey

All eyes have been on Texas for the past several days. The hurricane that blew into Corpus Christi and the flooding that continues to decimate the Houston area have dominated the news since it began. It is a very sad state of affairs for those affected by the flooding; many have lost everything.

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Three Things You’ll Never Hear Me Say in a Counseling Session

Have you heard this phrase before? It means that if you can think positively—put a positive spin on your problem, it won’t be so hard. As you know if you’ve tried this, the effect can be good, but it is rarely a lasting one. You can “think positive” about something for a time, but reality usually dictates that when something is difficult, one’s thinking about it can’t stay positive for long.

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Mantras, Bible Verses, and Change

Sincere believers want to change and become like Christ. Sadly, we have probably all at some point heard such people express frustration, disappointment, and despair at their continued failure to do so. Maybe you have experienced that yourself. What I have often seen is that they will take a Bible verse, or concept, and then recite these repeatedly, believing that by doing so, the problem will go away and they will change. They are repeating Bible verses in a mantra-like fashion, in an effort to bring about whatever it is that is so desperately wanted. What they are reciting is true, as it is the Word of God. The problem is that it is not specific enough and it results in the lack of change.

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Reflections of a Rookie Counselor, Part 2

In my last post, I shared with you some of the lessons I’ve learned about biblical counseling and discipleship as I’ve journeyed through my first few years as a certified biblical counselor. I had been in positions of leadership within my church, and had counseled many women over the years informally. About 10 years ago, I decided to pursue certification. Providentially, there were many circumstances beyond my control, and I didn’t actually receive my certification until just a few years ago.

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We are not a licensed counseling agency, nor are we psychologically or medically trained therapists. We offer 'pastoral' counseling intended to bring life change through heart change.