This is one of those topics I wish I didn’t have to address… however with porn being so readily available some couples have taken to viewing it separately and or together for purposes of sexual arousal. They justify this behavior by saying they actually only have sex with each other but use porn as a sort of a “jump start.” By viewing pornography alone or with your husband you are sinning with your eyes and your heart. (Matt. 5:27-29)

This is ungodly and if you have participated in this you must stop this immediately. Begin by confessing your sin to God and then to each other. You must then ask each others forgiveness and determine to never participate in these things again. Dispose of any pornography together for accountability sake. Purify your minds by meditating on the Scriptural truths regarding sex.

Unfortunately, I must also address the issue of husbands wanting their wives to participate in acts of sexual perversion-usually seen in pornographic movies or magazines. Husbands and wives are given wonderful freedom in the context of marriage to enjoy each other fully and completely. God has given us some restrictions that He has laid out as perversions. These are sexual acts that are unfortunately becoming more common as pornography becomes more prolific. Any sexual act, partner swapping, same sex acts, group sex, anal sex, voyeurism, or bondage and torture are all off limits for Christians. There are more items I could list but they only get more disgusting.

If your husband asks you to participate in any of these things, he is asking you to sin. You must kindly yet firmly tell him you cannot do this because you would be sinning. This is not an area of submission. A wife cannot submit or obey when her husband asks her to sin. God is her higher authority and these things are all forbidden in Scripture (Lev.18; 20:12; Rom 1:27; 1 Cor 5;1; 6:18; Jude 1:7).

Once you have confessed your sin to God and each other (when appropriate) asked forgiveness and granted forgiveness you can move on to renewing your mind with respect to sexual intimacy. It is critical for you to understand that what was done to you is not the same as the intimate relationship you are to share with your husband.