What is a true friend and how do I find one? What about my non-Christian friends, can I keep them? What are good boundaries for friendships? These are just some of the questions I have wrestled with as I have walked with Christ.
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Friendships between women can be honoring to God or dishonoring to Him.
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“Do I really need friends?”
This question was recently asked by a newcomer to our church, after she happened to mention to me that she really didn’t have any close friends in the area. Though she’d lived here for many years, she still had not really established any relationships beyond the surface of small talk and playdate arrangements with other moms. She added that she really gets all the advice and encouragement she needs from the blogs she reads and of course, her daily Bible reading.
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Maybe you are an introvert like me, and you just don’t want to put yourself out there. You’re not willing to be vulnerable in this way. Maybe you are of the mindset that you don’t have time for any more friends, so you keep your eyes on the horizon as you walk through the halls at church, and you breathe a sigh of relief when you make it to the car without being stopped. I have to admit, this has described me a time or two. I like to make productive use of my time, and chatting in the hallways does not usually seem to fit that goal.
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Licensed therapy requires that the relationship remain clinical. Once counseling is over, the relationship is also over. As biblical counselors, we often counsel friends, and sometimes we become friends with our counselees after the counseling ends. Our counselees are not just “clients”, they often are our brothers and sisters in Christ.
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We are not a licensed counseling agency, nor are we psychologically or medically trained therapists. We offer ‘pastoral’ counseling intended to bring life change through heart change.