Nineteen years ago I asked her what the most important lesson was that she had learned. Her answer was to put the cross into practice daily by dying to self and living for the Lord. Interestingly, this lady who has daily died to her sinful self since learning of its importance about 60 years ago, has experienced the real life that everyone longs for. By living this life, she has inspired countless others to live for the Lord as well.
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A single woman or single mother must not make decisions based on the popular opinion of her friends. She will be wise if she seeks wise counsel, but will be made a fool if she bows to the pressure of people pleasing versus honoring God (Galatians 1:10).
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You were created to glorify God (Isaiah 43:7). How are you doing right now, in this relationship with your daughter-in-law? If you sense conviction that you have been sinning in this relationship, repent and ask the Lord to help you love her. If this is a struggle, meditate on all that God has forgiven in your life, and the ways that He has loved you, even in your sin and rebellion.
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Open your bible and read it if you want to know the purpose of God for your life. A woman who is regenerated by the Holy Spirit can take her Bible with excellent study notes (I recommend the MacArthur Study Bible) and a good commentary (Barnes, Henry, MacArthur) and learn what she wants to know.
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There is a great deal of guilt that goes with this sandwich generation lifestyle, and it comes from all directions. We feel guilty when we leave our children to care for our parents, and we feel guilty when we don’t. You, your children, and your parents are all rolled up in one God-ordained family. Why not enjoy it together? Your parents and your children will benefit from the relationship, and you will find the burden of all that caregiving lifted when you include your family in your parents’ care.
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We are not a licensed counseling agency, nor are we psychologically or medically trained therapists. We offer ‘pastoral’ counseling intended to bring life change through heart change.